One of our biggest worries so far (apart from the ever looming “How are we going to heat this place without having to get a second mortgage!!!!”) has been water.
Specifically, water mysteriously coming up through the floorboards. Down onto the floorboards? Soaking through the sides of the house onto the floorboards? Possibly entering the floorboards through a wormhole portal from an alternate universe? Seriously, we couldn’t find there this stuff is coming from. We first thought it was obviously soaking up through the sand under the floor. But when we pulled up the boards to look underneath, there was a clear 2 foot gap between the floor and the ground underneath. Ok, we thought, there is an old bathroom and water heater upstairs. Maybe it was dripping down from there somewhere. But when the upstairs plumbing was all disconnected and ripped out – still more water. And worse, it started creeping up the floorboards towards the back of the house.
At this point, I was becoming seriously convinced by the alternative universe theory, and was planning on throwing a message in a bottle through the vortex ( “Dear alternative us. Please stop flooding our house. Oh, and has your universe got any ideas about how we can heat this mother?? xoxox” ).
We really want to keep the original matai floorboards, and it has been pretty discouraging to think that if the water keeps coming, we are going to have to rip it all up to try to solve it, and maybe even replace it with something waterproof. Not to mention that the water in some places has gotten so bad that the gib has started disintegrating. Not happy about having to replace some of the only finished walls in the whole building!!!
But there may be a light at the end of the tunnel. Quite literally, in fact. After talking to Seek a Leak to see if they thought they could help us pinpoint the source of the water, they suggested we get DrainSpy in. Agent Drains Bond (Clint) came round with his fancy high tech gear : a drain camera, very similar in appearance to an endoscope. An industrial size one. I’m sure that got used in one of the Bond movies (“For Your Eyes Only”, perhaps?). No Aston Martin though. So our drains were given a thorough colonoscopy (light? tunnel? you see where I was going there?) and a cleansing. I even got a souvenier DVD of the procedure. Turns out that quite a few of the drains were original, miniscule in diameter, and clogged with sand. I asked him hopefully if he thought that was the cause of the moisture seeping through the floors inside. “Nah, don’t reckon, mate” he said, in a very un-James Bond way, “But it needed to be done”. At this point, Clint was looking less like James Bond, and more like Dr No.
But looky here….
So we’re not quite there. But if all else fails, I’m still going with the idea of an indoors swimming pool. Although we may have to find somewhere else to put the pantry.